More than 50 years ago, Dale Carnegie wrote
one of the biggest-selling motivational books of all time, "How to Stop
Worrying and Start Living." The book is a bit outdated now, both in
writing style and content, but many of the points Carnegie made are still
applicable.
Carnegie focused a great deal on the acceptance
of the inevitable as a key to eliminating stress and worry. Though I agree with
him on this point to some extent, it's a bit more complicated than he made it
sound. That's because what some people think of as inevitable, others see as a
challenge that can be overcome.
For example, a person might believe that
failure is inevitable for him and thus resign himself to a life of misery. But
the reality is that failure is not inevitable, even when one is burdened by
horrific physical handicaps that cannot be changed. In this regard, three
now-deceased people – Ray Charles, Christopher Reeve and Mattie Stepanek – come
to mind. Notwithstanding their physical handicaps, all of them found a way to
achieve great things in their lifetimes.
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Likewise, millions of unknown individuals
with serious physical handicaps have found the mental and physical strength to
rise above those handicaps and lead meaningful, fulfilling lives. Carnegie's
point was that accepting the reality of their physical handicaps is what makes
it possible for such people to move forward.
The challenge, then, is for each of us to
determine what is and is not inevitable. Technically speaking, the only thing
that is 100 percent inevitable is death. But when you direct your energy away
from the inevitability of death, it paves the way for you to focus on
constructive living. In other words, the most rational way to deal with the
inevitable is to become so focused on a productive life that you don't have
time to think about it.
While death stands alone as the one aspect of
life that is truly inevitable, many other things are – shall we say – virtually
inevitable … taxation, future terrorist attacks on U.S. soil, and the periodic
collapse of the real estate and stock markets, among others. Yet, none of these
"inevitabilities" deserves your stress or worry.
Take taxes, for example. Instead of worrying
about taxes, you should do everything you can to legally keep your taxes to a
minimum, file your tax returns in a timely fashion, and focus your mental and
physical energy on making as much money as possible.
You may not like taxes, but the fact remains
that the more money you make, the more money you net after taxes. Thus, worry
and stress over taxes is counterproductive, because it distracts you from
getting on with doing the very things you need to do to increase your income.
Future terrorist attacks on U.S. soil? This
is a nasty fact of life and certainly a legitimate concern. By all means, you
should be prepared and take reasonable precautions to protect your family. But
it's important to go about living your life, just as the Israelis have learned
to do in the face of the inevitability of homicide bombings.
It also helps to keep terrorism in
perspective. As horrific as 9-11 was, nearly 15 times as many people die in
automobile accidents every year than in the terrorist attacks on New York and Washington.
As to real estate and stock market crashes,
the reality is that with or without government interference, both will continue
to occur periodically. They are an important aspect of capitalism, because they
bring prices in line with reality. (With communism, of course, all markets are
in a permanent state of collapse.) Accepting the inevitability of real
estate and stock market collapses makes it much more likely that you will make
rational decisions when it comes to financial planning.
It's also instructive to recognize that the
Hubble telescope project has proven that there is an invisible source of power
in the universe greater than the gravitational pull of all matter in the
universe combined. The relevance of this is that most perceived problems can be
overcome by tapping into this Universal Power Source.
And if it's possible to tap into an infinite
source of power, then stress is an unnecessary state of mind. After all, how
can one believe he is connected to an infinite source of power and
simultaneously be stressed? This is not about religion. Anyone – whether he be
a religionist or atheist – has the same human potential for tapping into the
Universal Power Source.
Finally, exerting mental energy to worry
about the inevitable makes no sense. If something is inevitable, there's
nothing you can do about it. And if there's nothing you can do about it, what's
the point in worrying?
A better idea is to invest your mental and
physical energy in 2007 thinking about how to be the best parent you can
possibly be, the best child you can possibly be, the best sibling you can
possibly be, and the best friend you can possibly be.
A tall order, to be sure. But to the extent
you fill that order in the coming year, that other little issue we worry so
much about – financial success – somehow works itself out without our having to
fret and stew about it.
